Sexy Sayings Naughty Quotes That Make You Laugh Hard

I am sure you have heard the famous line “Nothing risque, nothing gain”, right? Well,today let’s have some good clean fun reading these sexy sayings and naughty quotes by well-known celebrities like Mae West, Bette Davis, Cher, Pamela Anderson, and many more from  Michèle Brown’s compilation called “A Collection of Sexy Quotes“.

Here are some funny sexy quotes and funny naughty quotes from the book:

“A mistress should be like a little country retreat near the town – not to dwell in constantly, but only for a night and away!” – William Wycherley

“A dirty book is rarely dusty.” – Proverb

“A girl can wait for the right man to come along, but in the meantime that still doesn’t mean she can’t  have a wonderful time with all the wrong ones.” – Cher

“Some young Hollywood starlets remind me of my grandmother’s old farmhouse – all painted up nice on the front side, a big swing on the backside, and nothing whatsoever in the attic.” – Bette Davis

“The longer they wait, the better they like it” – Marlene Dietrich

“Two minutes of gooey near satisfaction followed by two weeks of haunting guilt is so much more easily attained at Haagen-Dazs.”  – Florence Campbell

“Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot” – Groucho Marx

“It’s okay to laugh in the bedroom so long as you don’t point.” – Will Durst

“Just because a man has something to stick out doesn’t mean he’s got to put it anywhere and everywhere.” – Goldie Hawn

“If I say have a beautiful body, you wouldn’t hold it against me, would you?” – David Fisher

“Whatever women do, they must do twice as well as men. Luckily, this is not difficult.” – Cahrlotte Whitton

“High heels were invented by a woman who had been kissed on the forehead.” – Christopher Morley

“Eight percent of American men cheat in America – the rest cheat in Europe.” – Jackie Mason

“Nothing is better for the spirit od the body than a love affair. It elevates thoughts and fattens stomach.” – Barbara Howar

“No matter how happily a woman may be married, it always pleases her to discover that there is a nice man who wishes she were not.” – Unknown

“A wolf whistle is like a train whistle. You like to hear it even though you’re not going anyplace.” – Eloise McElhone

“It’s great being blond –  with such low expectations its easy to impress.” – Pamela Anderson

“Adultery is the most conventional way to rise above the unconventional.” – Vladimir Nabokov

“If you want to know the secret of my success with women, then don’t smoke, don’t take drugs and don’t be too particular.” – George Best

“The trouble with life is that there are so many beautiful women and so litle time.” – John Barrymore

“Today’s unspeakable perversion is tomorrow’s kink is next week’s good clean fun.” – Dan Savage

“For a long time Iwas ashamed of the way I lived. I didn’t reform. I’m just not ashamed anymore.” – Mae West

“What matters is not the length of the wand, but the magic in the stick.” – Unknown

“Men aren’t attracted to me by my mind. They are attracted by what I don’t mind.” – Gypsy Rose Lee

“In my day hot pants, were something we had, not wore.” – Bette Davis

“It is the good girls who keep the diaries; the bad girls never have the time.” – Tallulah Bankhead

“She’s the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong.” – Mae West

“Pornography is the groin of the beholder.” – Unknown

“Men who aren’t pet lovers aren’t good in bed.” – Jilly Cooper

“A little coitus never hoitus.” – Graffito

“Hardly anyone marries when they’re in love – they’re in heat.” – William Lederer

“His voice was as intimate as the rustle of sheets.” – Dorothy Parker

“The is only one real tragedy in a woamn’s life. The fact that her past is always her lover, and her future is always her husband.” – Oacar Wilde

“Courtship is to marriage as a very witty prologue is to a dull play.” – William Congreve

“Permisiveness is removing the dust sheets from our follies.” – Edna O’Brien

“What attracts us in a woman rarely binds us to her.” – J. Churton Collins

“In love there is always one who kisses and one who offers the cheek.” – French Proverb

“Never let a kiss fool you and never let a fool kiss you.” – Betty Grable

“When women go wrong, men go right after them.” – Mae West

“I’m married, but I don’t wear a wedding ring because I’ve found that it tends to give women the impression that I’m unavailable.” – Bill Muse

“A maid that laughs is half taken.” – Proverb

“Men seldom make passes at a girl who surpassses.” – Franklin P. Jones

“Men always fall for frigid women because they put on the best show.” – Fanny Brice

“Men play the game; women know the score.” – Roger Woddis

“I don’t mind living in a man’s world as long as I can be a woman in it.” – Marilyn Monroe

“Statistics are like a bikini.  What they reveal is suggestive, but what they conceal is vital.” – Aaron Levenstein

“Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.”- Grocho Marx

“When beauty fires the blood, how love exalts the mind!” – John Dryden

“It is not strange that desire should so many years outlive performance?” -William Shakespeare

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