Funny Sayings About Life Is Funnier Than Fiction

According to research, our sense of humor can improve your health and life as a whole. Yes, laughter is the best medicine, so to speak. It is a powerful antidote to stress, pain, and conflict.

We can use laughter to cope with stress, improve our immune systems, reduced risk of heart attack and stroke. as a result, we can live longer.

So if you want to have a longer life span, laugh more and often.

So it is high time to read these wonderful selection of funny sayings about life is funnier than fiction to make you happy, healthy, so you get to enjoy longevity.

Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. – Margaret Mead

Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive. – Elbert Hubbard

People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do. – Isaac Asimov

I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade… And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party. – Ron White

An idea isn’t responsible for the people who believe in it. – Don Marquis

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. – Lana Turner

When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That’s relativity. – Albert Einstein

Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please. – Mark Twain

Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterdayProcrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday. – Don Marquis

I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly. – Winston Churchill

A day without sunshine is like, you know, night. – Steve Martin

No man has a good enough memory to be a successful liar. – Abraham Lincoln

If you haven’t got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me. – Alice Roosevelt Longworth

Laugh and the world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone. – Anthony Burgess

My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. – Mitch Hedberg

A woman’s mind is cleaner than a man’s: She changes it more often. – Oliver Herford

Too much agreement kills a chat. – Eldridge Cleaver

I’m an idealist. I don’t know where I’m going, but I’m on my way. – Carl Sandburg

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes. – Jim Carrey

Roses are red, violets are blue, I’m schizophrenic, and so am I. – Oscar Levant

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company. – Mark Twain

My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She’s ninety-seven now, and we don’t know where the hell she is. – Ellen DeGeneres

We owe a lot to Thomas Edison – if it wasn’t for him, we’d be watching television by candlelight. – Milton Berle

Anytime you see a turtle up on top of a fence post, you know he had some help. – Alex Haley

If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn’t sit for a month. – Theodore Roosevelt

I changed the face of comedy. I used to be funny. – Gilbert Gottfried

Kids cannot follow stories. They don’t know what the hell is going on in a cartoon. They like to see funny visual things happening. – John Kricfalusi

I know I’m funny, because I’m eccentric, I’m odd. I’m not what you expect. – Marian Seldes

It’s really funny because the same people who loved me as Stringer Bell were the same people that were watching ‘Daddy’s Little Girls’ literally in tears. – Idris Elba

I find it funny how people from Boston and New York hate each other because of pro teams. But, like, everyone on the Red Sox is a random millionaire athlete from somewhere else. – Julian Casablancas

I value comedy. I value somebody who can be funny. – James L. Brooks

I meditate and I also think about meditation. Which is funny. I think about Maharishi, about just the idea of meditating. It gives me something. – Brian Wilson

Wikipedia is just an incredible thing. It is fact-encirclingly huge, and it is idiosyncratic, careful, messy, funny, shocking and full of simmering controversies – and it is free, and it is fast. – Nicholson Baker

I have funny bones. If there’s ever any kind of tension, I’ll always be the one to try and be funny to loosen things up.
– Matt LeBlanc

I hear a lot of people singing in funny voices and singing like they’re stupid. Singing in a deliberately fey and dumb and childish way. And I find it to be a disturbing trend. – Daryl Hall

When I was younger I wanted to be a big movie star who’d get to be funny on talk shows and then I wanted to retire and write science fiction. – Scott Thompson

That’s why I like to get out there, and get people to see the other side of Mitt, and know us in a different reflection when you see the family and how funny he is with the boys and with the grand kids. And you know, just what a super guy he is. That’s part of what I am doing, is letting people see the other side of Mitt. – Ann Romney

I auditioned for a solo in church and got it. I was about seven and I sang a song called, ‘Jesus, I Heard You Had a Big House’ and I remember people standing up at the end and me thinking, ‘Oh, I think I’m going to like this.’ That’s how it all began. Sounds funny to say you got your start in church, but I did. – Kristin Chenoweth

I always thought it would be funny to have the Parents Television Council write an episode of ‘Family Guy’ and give them full creative control. Then see how good the episode is. That’s something we’ve actually discussed in the writers’ room. We haven’t proposed it yet, but if somebody from the PTC reads this, it might be worth discussing. – Seth MacFarlane

I’m never afraid to try something if I think it’s funny. And I know I’ll regret it if I don’t. – Seann William Scott

What am I responsible for? Who am I responsible to? Everybody? How come when Archie Bunker nailed everybody, it was funny – but when I do it, it’s not? – Sam Kinison

You have to be funny about it and honest about it. You can’t leave yourself out of that mix. You have to be honest enough to say, I’m that messed-up one in the family. – Louie Anderson

The funny thing about having all this so-called success is that behind it is a certain horrible emptiness. – Sam Shepard

It’s funny – I read that women look to chiseled-faced guys for one-night stands, and to round-faced guys for marriage. When I’m rounder in the face, I like to say, ‘This is my long-term look.’ Or ‘This is my wife-and-kids look right here.’ – Garrett Hedlund

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it. – Terry Pratchett

The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron. – Phyllis Diller

I have a memory like an elephant. I remember every elephant I’ve ever met. – Herb Caen

Any girl can be glamorous. All you have to do is stand still and look stupid. – Hedy Lamarr

I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people. – Rodney Dangerfield

I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three. – Elayne Boosler

It’s amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper. – Jerry Seinfeld

Weather forecast for tonight: dark. – George Carlin

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy. – Benjamin Franklin

We are all here on earth to help others; what on earth the others are here for I don’t know. – W. H. Auden

Cure for an obsession: get another one. – Mason Cooley

I’m sorry, if you were right, I’d agree with you. – Robin Williams

If you’re going to do something tonight that you’ll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late. – Henny Youngman

If women ran the world we wouldn’t have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days. – Robin Williams

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by. – Douglas Adams

Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing. – Robert Benchley

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck. – George Carlin

Men are liars. We’ll lie about lying if we have to. I’m an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive. – Tim Allen

Prejudice is a great time saver. You can form opinions without having to get the facts. – E. B. White

By all means let’s be open-minded, but not so open-minded that our brains drop out. – Richard Dawkins

The world is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper. – Bertrand Russell

It takes considerable knowledge just to realize the extent of your own ignorance. – Thomas Sowell

If you’re naturally kind, you attract a lot of people you don’t like. – William Feather

It’s simple, if it jiggles, it’s fat. – Arnold Schwarzenegger

If you can’t get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you’d best teach it to dance. – George Bernard Shaw

If two wrongs don’t make a right, try three. – Laurence J. Peter

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments. – Chris Rock

Electricity is really just organized lightning. – George Carlin

Money won’t buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem. – Bill Vaughan

All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height. – Casey Stengel

I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member. – Groucho Marx

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me. – Fred Allen

Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese. – Luis Bunuel

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city. – George Burns

I wear a necklace, cause I wanna know when I’m upside down. – Mitch Hedberg

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot. – Groucho Marx

Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely. – P. J. O’Rourke

Every time I see an adult on a bicycle, I no longer despair for the future of the human race. – H. G. Wells

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die. – Mel Brooks

I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific. – Lily Tomlin

I wanna make a jigsaw puzzle that’s 40,000 pieces. And when you finish it, it says ‘go outside.’ – Demetri Martin

One of the disadvantages of wine is that it makes a man mistake words for thoughts. – Samuel Johnson

Reality continues to ruin my life. – Bill Watterson

If you live to be one hundred, you’ve got it made. Very few people die past that age. – George Burns

I would like to die on Mars. Just not on impact. – Elon Musk

My definition of an intellectual is someone who can listen to the William Tell Overture without thinking of the Lone Ranger. – Billy Connolly

Two wrongs don’t make a right, but they make a good excuse. – Thomas Szasz

If I want to knock a story off the front page, I just change my hairstyle. – Hillary Clinton

It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person’s plate. – Dave Barry

Conversation would be vastly improved by the constant use of four simple words: I do not know. – Andre Maurois

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it. – W. C. Fields

What’s another word for Thesaurus? – Steven Wright

I was eating in a Chinese restaurant downtown. There was a dish called Mother and Child Reunion. It’s chicken and eggs. And I said, I gotta use that one. – Paul Simon

A nickel ain’t worth a dime anymore. – Yogi Berra

Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before. – Mae West

Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen. – Albert Einstein

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food. – W. C. Fields

They say marriages are made in Heaven. But so is thunder and lightning. – Clint Eastwood

Society is like a stew. If you don’t stir it up every once in a while then a layer of scum floats to the top. – Edward Abbey

Life is hard. After all, it kills you. – Katharine Hepburn

If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee. – Abraham Lincoln

Do not worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older it will avoid you. – Joey Adams

Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost a very important part of your life. – Brooke Shields

My life needs editing. – Mort Sahl

There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full. – Henry A. Kissinger

Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves? – Robin Williams

Children are smarter than any of us. Know how I know that? I don’t know one child with a full time job and children. – Bill Hicks

A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours. – Milton Berle

All generalizations are false, including this one. – Mark Twain

When we talk to God, we’re praying. When God talks to us, we’re schizophrenic. – Jane Wagner

As a child my family’s menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it. – Buddy Hackett